Friday, March 17, 2006


FOLLOW TRAFFIC PATTERNS
Anyone who has ever operated or ridden in a motor vehicle has seen the above sign alongside the roadway. It usually appears where construction is being done on the road so traffic is often slow to begin with. So why am I writing this post? Why am I taking time out of my very angry day to remind you all what this sign means? That's easy.....today I was returning from the pet store and was driving on one of those 3 lane highways that is seemingly ALWAYS under construction (There is at least ONE road like this in everybody's neighborhood, so I'm sure you all know what I mean) when I encountered the aforementioned sign.
I'm loping along at a good 30 mph tops (due to the year round, never accomplishing anything construction) when I see the following sign. So I, of course, get over right away. Now comes the topic of this post. I HATE PEOPLE who CONTINUE to drive in the lane that's ABOUT TO CLOSE and follow IN THAT LANE until they MUST merge thus BLOCKING TRAFFIC in the center lane for 1,000 miles. What is the problem with simply pulling outta the right hand lane as soon as you see this sign? You have to speed up and drive like a fucking asshole then FORCE your way in front of someone who followed the correct traffic pattern. And if that person fails to yield to YOUR IMPORTANT CAR, you almost smash into them trying to get over before you run outta road. I hate this. This should be an executable offense. It's effect is magnified by a billion if you're driving in the CITY and traffic in the right lane must merge into the center. You can be stuck in a seemingly ENDLESS traffic jam cuz of all the fucking ASSHOLES who must speed ahead of everyone to get "the best spot."
Where are you going? Unless you have a victim of a sucking chest wound in the back seat of your car, WHY must you position yourself to be MAYBE 3 cars ahead of where you would have been had you simply pulled to the left ASAP? This infuriates me to no end. I wanna get outta my car, drag the offending driver onto the concrete and pummel them into oblivion, all the while screaming "JUST PULL THE FUCK OVER YOU TRAFFIC JAM CAUSING ASSHOLE!!!" I could probably do this too and not hold up traffic cuz ALL traffic is ALREADY at a dead stop due to YOU. I hate people. And blinding stupidity in traffic just magnifies this hate.
**I have decided to use this blog to get off my chest ALL that bothers me, not just politics and religion. I have been told venting like this is healthier than parading around the bunker in my underwear while spinning the barrel of a large caliber handgun and yelling at my dogs. We'll see. As to date, I've been pretty successful with the whole underwear/barrel spinning/dog berating thing. But I'll give it a try.